Becoming a parent and in my case a father/dad is something hard to describe until it happens to you. I used to remember before we had Harley, everyone saying how much your life will change and how amazing the feeling is. I didn’t really give it any thought. Of course my life would change and it would be a cool feeling to help a person grow, learn and share the world with, but you still can’t relate.
Having testicular cancer and chemo gave me a lower chance of being able to father a child so I always had that in the back of my mind. Men with testicular cancer generally have a lower sperm count to begin with – I was no different. So the news that Harley was going to come into this world was something of relief, excitement and fear for what was to be.
People say when you have a child your life as you know it is over. A lot of guys joke about how it literally is over! Wilda and I approached it with the attitude of not letting becoming a parent end your life as you know it but more of an adaptation to your life. Why should it stop you from travelling or doing the things you love? Sure, to a certain degree, especially early on, some things in your life take a back seat. I am very lucky to have the most amazing wife and mother to Harley I could imagine; someone who is so strong, caring and supportive of both myself and Harley. She has allowed me to continue to chase my goals and put in extra work even if it means her shouldering most of the load. I don’t think I will ever be able to thank her enough for all the sacrifices she’s made and continues to make for me and us as a family. I only hope one day I can give her everything she deserves and more!
Becoming a dad has given me a great perspective on life and a greater sense of motivation to be better every day. The first few months for me were difficult to adapt to. Harley had severe reflux, colic and caught whooping cough – meaning a couple of weeks spent in hospital when he was only a month or so old. I have regrets about how I handled some of the situations we faced. Becoming a dad is something you can’t prepare for, no matter how many people give you advice- so I’m not about to go lecturing you all about what to do/expect ; )
I can tell you that it gives you an extra spark, an extra motivating factor in your life, a different kind of smile and a different kind of happiness that I hadn’t felt prior to Harley joining us. Harley gives me motivation to train harder, to do that little bit extra when my mind and body are screaming at me to quit. He’s in my head telling me to do more, because in every aspect of my life I want to get better for him, to be able to provide the best possible life for him and my family.
Training and keeping fit is a huge part of my life. I have managed to juggle that alongside running two businesses all whilst being a dad and a husband. It’s not about bragging. Shit gets hard, tiring and stressful! It’s about priorities. My training hasn’t suffered, in fact I have improved in every aspect of it since Harley has arrived, at the same time I launched a business – www.bodyweightbuilt.com – Being a parent is not an excuse to give up on yourself but rather a reason to push harder, to better yourself and lead by example. My training style has allowed me to spend more time with Wilda and Harley, getting them involved and bringing Harley to our workouts by the beach, in a local park or even in the living room. It’s about adapting and having freedom! If you would like to know more about my training and hear from others who are doing the same, head over to www.bodyweightbuilt.com and join the movement! I would love to be able to work with you one on one to help you achieve your goals. 